My windowsill garden died this week. My herbs and spices grew too big for the little planter I had them in, and I have nowhere to put a bigger one. It kinda feels like a metaphor. I have this clear vision of what I want in my life, a nice outline, with pictures saved in a folder on my computer. But it seems like if I am going to get there, that it is going to be the scenic route.
I wish that things fell into place when my heart needed them as desperately as it does lately. However, I must say that whereas I am not getting everything right now, things are not running in the other direction. I am grateful for that. Like this farm for instance, it is moving slowly, but in the right direction. I just wish that I could have these assurances, promises that if I am patient, God will get them to me eventually. It is so hard running on faith.
But I remember the verse that says "If your child asks for bread, would you give him a stone?" and whereas I don't know the address for it, or even the verbatim wording, it does help bring me comfort. And I pray that God realigns my desires to match his will. And that way, I will never be disappointed. (But I worry that it is kind of a selfish way to play it)
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